I have insomnia. Lately it's been getting better, I've been going to bed before 1 am, sometimes before midnight. Maybe tonight, maybe not. Maybe once I get this particular anxiety off my chest, I will become calmed.
Insomnia for me happens when I am worried. Some nights, it's because I don't have a meal plan 3 days before I need to go shopping. Some nights, it's because of upcoming events or major and minor decisions. Tonight, it's because I defended my faith, and in doing so my day was interrupted with meditations on the problems of the world.
People divorce and remarry because they do not know the true definition of love. They decide to take the easy way out, and suicide is commended, praised, and funded. They decide to kill their children and pervert God's nature, because they were too irresponsible to listen to their will, and instead allowed themselves to be guided by their passions. They use God's own natural world against Him, to justify so called "sex change" and other abominations. And then, they expect Christians to believe in something wrong, and not only believe it, but cater to it. The world tells everybody that the sky is green and that water is poison, and when some decide to stand up and call them liars, those few are called cowards. Isn't the truly cowardly thing to just agree in public, and then go on drinking water? Why wouldn't we want to educate the world that water is in fact, good for you? But we are labeled cowards.
In a country where my rights are more important than yours, my rights to a cake are more important than your right to practice your faith, the Catholics are fighting this battle in the wrong way. Didn't Christ warn us that we would be persecuted for our beliefs? The early centuries of the Church were centuries of martyrdom, that recommenced during the Protestant Revolution, although those martyrdoms are largely forgotten and ignored. Those centuries taught the world something: once you start killing people, you make martyrs out of them. Instead, you have to persecute people in ways that not only are deniable, but seem ridiculous. It seems ridiculous that people wouldn't just bake a cake for someone, it's just a cake. It seems ridiculous to talk of religious persecution, when there are so many "Christians" in the world. A person says: "I believe that love and tolerance are above all other things. Therefore, because you don't believe this way, you are evil". A Catholic says "This is what the Church teaches. We do not interpret the Bible for ourselves, we leave that to the professionals. We do not believe that everything is in the Bible, because even St. John said that there was much more taught that couldn't be written down. And we adhere to the ultimate truths that have been passed down directly from God Himself. We will pray for the non-believers, we will pray that those who are misguided find the truth, we will pray for those who misguide others, for they will be held to judgment. And we will not pass judgements on others, but live our faith even in the face of ridicule and hatred."
Instead of making the battle for morality about us, we need to make it about God. God has a right to be worshipped the way He demanded, and if you can believe this basic truth, you will have all the strength you need to fight the battles demanded of you. If this means that you are fined, hated, ridiculed, remember that the early Catholics wouldn't even offer a token of incense to a false god, instead choosing death. I need to instill in my children the love of God, the will to cling to Him above all else, even forsaking family and friends when necessary to defend our truly beautiful Faith.
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